Sometimes We Need to Zoom Out
Reminder! Wednesday Wisdom is now being sent on the first Wednesday of each month rather than every week. After two years of bringing you weekly content, I’m freeing up your in-box and sharing these reflections and resources once a month instead…
In addition to my financial planning practice, I also coach a number of financial advisors across the country. Periodically I like to send out a survey and check in with them to make sure that what I am providing in terms of advice and deliverables is meeting their needs. Last week, I sent a survey asking for feedback and any thoughts they wanted to share to help me improve their experience in working with me.
A surprisingly high number of people responded. The results were incredibly positive. On the 1-10 scale of happiness and satisfaction, the average score was a 9.5— amazing! People’s comments were very complementary. Many people added additional feedback thanking me for going above and beyond to problem solve or help them with a unique issue. You might logically conclude that I was happy and proud of the results I received.
I would have been, except for the one person who gave an overall score of 4, said they felt “okay” with my deliverables, that was work was “fine” and that they “might” refer others to me in the future.
Despite the stats from other respondents whose scores were 9’s and 10’s— and the glowing reviews from the 65 people who answered the survey— I immediately zoomed into the one person who gave me the less-than-stellar review. I wanted to call the person and get more feedback, apologize for whatever was missing in my process, and see what I could do to fix/improve their experience.
The person about whom I was obsessing also opted to remain anonymous in the survey. Calling them up wasn’t a possibility because I couldn’t pinpoint who it was. I replayed conversations in my mind and tried to recall any indication of dissatisfaction from anyone over the past few weeks. Words like “okay” and “fine” and “maybe” didn’t settle well with me. It became all I could think about.
That’s when I realized that my zooming in and focusing solely on one mediocre survey score completely discredited the other positive scores I received. I became blind to the other compliments and kudos when I couldn’t see beyond the one seemingly-negative response.
How often do we zoom into a negative detail and obsess over it— completely losing sight of the bigger picture?
Have you ever had a night out at a dinner party, conversed for hours, felt like you had a great time— but then returned home only to rethink one comment you made that you wish you hadn’t? And you continued to replay that conversation over and over, cringing at those few words you said? Before you know it, the event that you had been perceived as fun becomes a lousy memory, ruined by something you see as negative. You zoomed in to one tiny detail and let it overshadow the positive.
Our friends went with their kids to Disney recently. They planned an epic trip and tried to pack in everything possible. On the last day of their vacation, their five-year-old twins had a complete meltdown mid-day at Animal Kingdom. Understandably, the family cut their time short at the park and instead returned to the hotel. After a nap, the kids spent the afternoon lounging by the hotel pool that included a water slide and a lazy river ride. When I later asked how the trip was, my friend said it was a total mistake to take the kids so young, and proceeded to share every negative detail of the Animal Kingdom Meltdown. She said she wished they didn’t go on the trip at all. In her recollection, the last day of the vacation put a damper on the entire week. But if you ask the twins how their vacation was, they’ll tell you without hesitation that it was “super awesome” and share a dozen highlights— including how much they loved their last day at the hotel pool. Often, kids know better than grown-ups how to zoom out and focus on the bigger picture.
What about you? Think back over the past six months: Have you looked back on your Christmas season and thought about how much joy your family experienced, or did you zoom in on the Visa bill you received in January and regret how much money you spent? Do you reminisce about your amazing trip to Italy and all the decadent meals and wine you tasted? Or do you obsess about the 5 pounds you gained and regret the daily pizza you enjoyed so much when you were there?
Are you someone who zooms in and focuses on one negative, over-shadowing detail, letting it ruin the bigger picture and all the other the otherwise great memories associated with it? Me too.
We could all use some practice zooming out.
Next time you look back on a scene, an experience, or a conversation, and you start to gravitate toward something negative that stands out, instead try to apply a wider lens to your perspective. Focus on the macro rather than the micro. Zoom out rather than zooming in.
I thought about this a lot as I went back to those survey results. It took some real effort. Only when I was finally able to zoom out was I able to feel proud about the bigger picture.
This Week’s Resources
Moolah Kicks
Check out these awesome sneakers called Moolah Kicks and meet Natalie White, former basketball player and creator of this new brand. Fueled by her passion for women's basketball, Natalie left the world of investment banking to build a brand that puts female ballers first. Taking into consideration the specific needs of the female athlete, her aim is to ignite the culture, elevate the game, and give women’s basketball the spotlight it deserves. And kudos to Dick’s Sporting Goods for featuring these sneakers in most of their stores: https://www.dickssportinggoods.com/s/moolahkicks
Who Doesn’t Love a Well-Made Jelly Bean?
Have you ever had Jelly Belly brand jelly beans and wonder how they pack so much unique flavor into each tiny unit of candy? There’s an art and science behind every flavor, and their manufacturing story is fascinating. Click here for a virtual tour of their factory and learn how these little gems get made: https://www.popsci.com/technology/jelly-belly-bean-factory-photos/
Retirement, Margaritaville Style
I’ve been preparing for a webinar I am leading on April 13th about Happiness in Retirement. I’ve been researching the most important elements that provide people a feeling of happiness and security during retirement. A client shared this article. It captures the essence of my talk perfectly. If what we are seeking in our golden years is fun, community and purpose, then maybe a move to Margaritaville is what we should consider! https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2022/03/28/retirement-the-margaritaville-way
Disclosure: Securities and investment advisory services offered through registered representatives of MML Investors Services, LLC, Member SIPC. The Jamrog Group is not a subsidiary of MML Investors Services, or its affiliated companies. Supervisory Office: 330 Whitney Ave. Suite 600 Holyoke, MA 01040 Telephone: (413) 539-2000.