What Do Our Scars Say
We recently had a successful photo shoot at our office. The updated pictures of everyone came out great and I was excited to upload them to our website once the final proofs were done. The photographer emailed us the album of all the shots. She asked us to look them over carefully, and let her know if there were any extra touch-ups any of us wanted.
“Yes, would you mind covering up the scar on my face a little more? The one under my right eye.” My request seemed straight-forward.
The photographer was surprised. “What scar? I don’t see anything under your eye.”
How could she not see it? That faint line down my right cheek was all I could see when I looked at my photo.
Granted, it’s been many years and my face has had plenty of time to heal. I also follow a makeup technique each morning that mostly covers what’s left of the evidence of my surgery. And you probably wouldn’t notice it if I didn’t point it out to you. But I still see it.
Five years ago, I had a tiny bump under my right eye that wouldn’t go away. My dermatologist didn’t like the look of it during my routine check-up and wanted to biopsy it. Good thing she did: Turns out I had a pre-cancerous tumor hiding under that little bump and needed to have it removed. It took a MOHS surgeon, then an ocular plastic surgeon, to carefully get rid of the olive-sized tumor, make sure they didn’t damage my eye or my tear duct in the process, then repair the damage.
I was left with 100 stitches and 12 weeks of recovery.
I’m now fine. The recovery actually went better than expected, I have no residual skin cancer. But every time I look in the mirror, it’s the first thing I notice. On Zoom calls— when the sun comes through the window and hits my face at just the wrong angle— I move my camera in an attempt to hide it.
July 2016, six weeks after surgery.
Do you have scars you try to hide?
Do your scars tell a story about you and your past? For me they do. There’s the skinned knee I got in second grade that never quite healed, but reminds me that I was running with excitement to my best friend’s house when it happened. There’s my C-section scar, a faint reminder that my baby turns 21 this year.
We all have scars that originated somewhere in our past, and likely will remain with us for our lifetimes. Each one is a part of who we are.
Some people’s scars are visible to everyone. Others have scars that are easy to hide with clothing or makeup, like those tiny incisions from your laparoscopic appendectomy or the very-bad-idea tattoo you eventually had removed with that painful laser procedure.
Other people carry the kind of scars that are invisible, the ones that tell a story of your past but are impossible for the rest of us to see. Only you know they are there. They too have in some way shaped who you’ve become.
Take a moment this week to think about your scars and what they say about you. Are you so accustomed to having them that you’ve forgotten to notice their presence? Or like me, do you sometimes give them more weight than they need?
Maybe this is the week we take time to acknowledge our history and the scars we carry (visible or invisible), and trust that we are all stronger and braver because of them.
This Week’s Resources
Stains Can Be Removed
While scars might be with us for life, stains can sometimes be removed. Ever wonder about pesky stains and the best way to tackle them? First think like a scientist, then read here for some very useful tips from NPR: https://www.npr.org/2019/12/17/789172148/how-do-i-get-this-out-your-guide-to-stain-removal
From Football to Finance
I love this story about Steve Young. From a football star, to an ESPN sports announcer, to a finance guru (yes, finance guru!), you have to read about how he grew up and the lessons that shaped his path. He also is brilliant at integrating all the things in life he loves into the enviable “job” he now has: https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2017-02-09/steve-young-is-an-athlete-who-s-actually-good-at-finance
Are You Feeling Adventureful?
Girl Scout Cookie Season is officially underway, and this year they are offering a new cookie called Adventurefuls. These little gems are “an indulgent brownie-inspired cookie with caramel-flavored crème and a hint of sea salt.” To learn more about where you can buy cookies and support a local troop, click here for the Cookie Finder: https://www.girlscouts.org/en/cookies/how-to-buy-cookies.html
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